Dear Curt (Letter #3)

Hey Curt,
I've had a pretty crappy couple of weeks.  Actually, the past two months have not been all that great...but July 2nd is quickly approaching.  I was so excited for the six of us to go on vacation together and I know that you were too.  We had teased that either we would come back ready to make a commitment or it would cause a break-up. Who knows what would have happened?  I guarantee we would have had fun though...we always did when we were together :-)

So...I'm leaving this weekend.  Me and my kids and my mom are headed to Florida.  Thank goodness for my Mom, I don't know what I would do without her.  Jeremy is staying at my house and he and Daddy are going to dog sit Mason.  Mason is a great dog but he gets quite destructive when left alone.  He also will not eat if no one is home.  I hope he will eat while I'm gone!  He got nervous after you died and started chewing on a place on his back but the hair is finally growing back in so I guess that means he is adjusting well. 

Mason's 1st birthday is tomorrow!  I finally registered him the other day.  The people who gave him to you had named him Mason Xanadu but I changed his name.  According to the CKC (Continental Kennel Club) I am the proud owner of a male, red merle, Australian Shepherd born June 29, 2011 and his official name is Mason CurtDavis.  Now, anyone with registered puppies from him will know that he belonged to you...that's why I chose that name.  He is an excellent guard dog - very protective of me and Edison - a little too protective sometimes.  He hates when I discipline Edison!  I had to get on Mason one night for acting crazy when Edison was throwing a tantrum.  Now, when Edison is in trouble, Mason goes and lays in my closet.  He can't stand it!!!  I never really wanted a dog but having Mason has been great!  I love having him around to keep me company.

So, I've wondered how we would have ended up driving to Florida. You kept going back and forth between taking my car or your truck or renting something bigger.  Last I heard, you said we were taking your truck and going Hillbilly style with all of our stuff strapped on the flatbed - LOL. You also said you couldn't leave Mason behind.  I'm not sure where he was going to ride??

Oh...and I think the plan was to Nair your back before we left - hahaha!!  You and your hairy back.  It was your idea though...you said you wanted it shaved, waxed or Naired.  I think I wanted to wax because I knew that would be the most painful and you wanted to Nair because that would be least painful.  I'm laughing as I type this because we had this silly discussion way too many times and would always start laughing. 

There's a song that has been on my mind for awhile.  I hadn't heard it in a long time and heard it a few days after you died.  I felt like it was a song "sent to me from you" and when I heard it, I immediately thought of how sad it was going to be when I got to the ocean without you.  I know I'm going to think about you a lot.  I plan to relax and enjoy the sand and the sun.  I have no doubt that I will miss you being there but that I will feel your presence.  Mostly, I want to come home with a clear mind and a fresh start knowing that you will always have a special place way down deep inside my heart...

PLEASE REMEMBER ME/Tim McGraw

When all our tears have reached the sea

Part of you will live in me
Way down deep inside my heart
The days keep coming without fail
A new wind is gonna find your sail
That's where your journey starts

You'll find better love

Strong as it ever was
Deep as the river runs
Warm as the morning sun
Please remember me


Just like the waves down by the shore
Your gonna keep on coming back for more
'Cause we don't ever wanna stop
Out in this brave new world you seek
O'er the valleys and the peaks
And I can see you on the top

You'll find better love
Strong as it ever was
Deep as the river runs
Warm as the morning sun
Please remember me


Remember me when you're out walkin'
When snow falls high outside your door
Late at night when you're not sleepin'
And moonlight falls across your floor
When I can't hurt you anymore


Chours:
You'll find better love
Strong as it ever was
Deep as the river runs
Warm as the morning sun
Please remember me
Please remember me

That's exactly what I want and I hope this week away will help me get there. 

One more thing...the girls are mad!  They intended to have access to your MiFi wireless internet for the ride down to Florida and for our week in Florida.  Now...that's not gonna happen.  What am I gonna do with two teenagers without internet access for a week including 28 hours in a car?  I guess we'll be playing license plate BINGO and lots of I SPY - haha!  I'm thinking about tethering my phone but that will mean I will lose my unlimited data plan and I'm not sure that is a good financial decision.  I'm always having to make a decision and I HATE making decisions.

I wish you were still here, Curt...I wish things were different...I wish you were going on vacation with me...I wish so many things...

I love you,
Tie Dye